Questions are important. They can shape the way our minds respond in any given moment. It is the very nature of the mind to question anything and everything…
Questions like…
- Are we there yet?
- When?
- How?
- What?
- Where?
- Why?
And on and on
Can either drive us nuts or empower us.
In this blog, let’s explore…
- What kind of questions inspire you?
- What kinds of questions truly engage you?
- What inquiries are most important to you?
- What sort of questions do you find yourself constantly exploring?
- What questions inspire you to learn or act?
- What questions do you get stuck in or struck by?
- What questions keep you caught in fear and anxiety?
- Would you like to be empowered by your internal inquiry?
To be or not to be
To have or not to have
To do or not to do
To believe or not to believe
These are interesting questions…
Questions can be useful, circular, doubting, curious, speculative, strategic, empowering or disempowering. As a LiberatingTouch (LT) Facilitator and Instructor, I often focus on questions that enlighten, engage and support my clients or students to know (love) themselves better. This blog isn’t about those sorts of questions. This blog is an invitation for you to notice what kind of questions repeatedly show up in your thinking. Do they harm or help you in your life? Do your internal questions create conflict and confusion, or do they inspire you to express truth, love, peace and self-responsibility?
The Power of Questions
EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), The Sedona Method, and the Work of Byron Katie helped me understand the power of questions. In EFT, questions help us tune into whatever is awry in our lives with compassionate understanding.
The Sedona Method is a technique that assists emotional release and letting go of limiting beliefs and feelings. It primarily uses a simple set of questions to guide you through the process. While there are variations, the core questions are:
- Could I let this feeling go?
Or “Could I allow this feeling to be here?” or “Could I welcome this feeling?”). This question is about possibility. It is not about a yes or no answer, it is about paying attention to where you are at.
- Would I let this feeling go?
This question explores your willingness. Are you willing to release it? A “yes” or “no” is fine. If you answer “no” or are unsure, you might ask yourself, “Would I rather have this feeling, or would I rather be free?” This helps clarify your desire for freedom from the emotion.
- When?
This is an invitation to release it now. It encourages you to become present and not trapped in the past, or focused on a future.
Byron Katie’s “The Work” is a process of self-inquiry that helps people identify and question the thoughts that cause them suffering. It consists of four core questions, followed by a “turnaround.”
First you note down the stressful thought… and then inquire
- Is it true?
This isn’t about whether you believe it’s true, but whether it’s an uncompromising fact. Often, just asking this question can begin to shift your perspective.
- Can you absolutely know that it’s true?
This question takes the inquiry deeper. Even if you initially answered “yes” to the first question, can you really, absolutely, 100% know that it’s true, without any doubt, in every circumstance, for everyone? This invites you to consider if there’s any other possible reality.
- How do you react – what happens – when you believe that thought?
This is where you observe the impact of the thought on your life. What feelings arise (anger, sadness, anxiety, frustration)? How do you treat yourself when you believe it? How do you treat others? What physical sensations do you experience? What actions do you take (or avoid taking)? This question helps you see the cause-and-effect relationship between your thought and your struggles.
- Who would you be without the thought?
Imagine yourself in the same situation, but without that specific stressful thought present in your mind. How would you feel? How would you act? What would be different? This question invites you to experience a state of freedom from stressful thoughts.
After going through the four questions, the final step is to turn the thought around.
But what if the Questions themselves are the key?
What I am suggesting here is not simply about using questions to unravel your stressful thoughts, but to pay attention to how questions themselves can lead you to either suffering, surrender, or satori. Paying attention to the internal habitual questions, can in itself shift your reality. Adopting an empowering question as a mantra can lead to liberation and joy.
Our lives are shaped by our thinking. Stress follows debilitating fearful thoughts as the wheels of a cart follow the oxen that draws it. Contentment arises from pure thoughts like birdsong at dawn.
We all have pivotal questions we ask ourselves whenever we’re under stress. The quality of your question reflects the quality of the action you take.
Are you aware of the question that arises whenever you get stressed?
For eg.
- How am I going to get through the day?
- Am I going to fail?
- Am I going to look stupid, be judged, dismissed?
- Why is this happening to me?
- Am I going to be accepted?
These are not enabling or encouraging questions for the psyche especially when you are struggling to keep it together. In fact they can have the opposite effect.
Other examples of stress feeding questions are,
- How am I going to feed my family?
- How am I going to pay the bills?
- Why do I keep messing up?
- What is wrong with me?
- How can I beat the competition?
In relation to the last question above, imagine if it was replaced by, How can I express more of myself and contribute more? The chances are that this question could lead to excellence and greater success in one’s endeavours. Paying attention to the nature of the questions that show up, will nurture how you encounter solutions.
Do you have a question that is running your internal show? your life? Or your relationships?
Here are a few of the questions that I have worked through over the years:
- Why am I here?
- When will I die and how will I die?
- What is the purpose of existence
- How can I serve?
- How can I do better, be better?
- Who am I?
- What do I want, why do I want this, what does this desire serve?
- Why am I so fat, ugly, clumsy, and disorganised?
- How can I forgive myself for being such a failure?
- Is it my fault?
- How can I have done it differently?
- Can I change the past?
- Why are people so greed driven?
- What matters to me now? What matters now?
- How can I be worthy? Discerning?
- When will it end?
- What if I had no fear? What kind of decisions would I make? What kind of actions would I take?
- Who would I be if I had no fear?
More recently, following Eddie’s death (my beloved husband) the questions that surfaced were –
- How do I survive this?
- What is the guidance now?
- How can I embody the Oneness I experience?
- What will help me to stay bliss aligned and centred?
- What is true for me now?
When I look to the mind for solutions I get answers that lead to more questions. These answers are often recycled or circular. When I look for answers externally, from others, I feel influenced, unsettled, and unsure. When I sit with my questions in meditation with the Illumined Self or IS, I experience space, clarity, hints and clues. The IS can also be described as The Inner Divinity, the Intuitive Integrated Innate Self, the Core Truth of I, the God-Self, or the Heart.
The I S often side-steps giving me the certainty the mind seeks, yet fills me with an expansiveness that I recognise. Sometimes, the answers are forthright, but more often than not, they are unexpected. And there are times with the IS when the questions lead to questions that are in themselves answers. These silence all thought. And yes, the mind can hi-jack these intuitive moments with its desires and attachments, and that is okay, exactly as it is meant to be. The I S – Heart recognises the perfection of avoidance, denial, resistance, and ignorance.
(k)NO(w)
The mind loves questions, loves seeking answers, they are like puzzles, games, adventures to go on, conundrums to explore. The heart loves questions too, questions that inspire compassion, courage and creativity.
Inquiry that arises from the heart doesn’t always invite answers, these questions can lead to Knowing, (k)NO(w) questions. The questions from the mind elicit answers that lead to more questions. It’s a fun thing to notice.
What if you could become aware of the question that’s running the show in the background, bring it to the foreground. And then change it, so it uplifts you how you radiate, what you resonate with, and why you do what you do.
Sometimes changing the question can change your life.
What is your habitual question in life at the moment?
What question would you like to ask yourself, that supports you and your life?
The question I enjoy asking myself nowadays is,
“What is true, what is loving, what IS now?”
Thank you for walking with me,
Love and blessings, Ranjana
Ranjana Appoo is a dynamic author and co-creator of LiberatingTouch, known for her joyful approach to life and passion for truth. Alongside her partner, Eddie Appoo, she has co-authored the book “Detachment – The Secret to Infinite Peace”. With a vibrant spirit and a commitment to Love, Ranjana continues to inspire others to embark on the paths of Self-Realisation through her writings, teachings, and compassionate presence
