A client said this to me in passing just the other day, “When did we get so afraid? Things are so uncertain now…”
In actuality, the fear she sensed is not a new phenomenon, it is just coming to the surface, become more noticeable. Interestingly enough, the masks that we are asked to wear, unmask fear.
The question is, can we meet this fear with compassion and love? IF, we want to find peace, contentment and real solutions that help rather than hide, I don’t think there is a choice.
I often ask our clients that are parents, “What has been your most successful strategy in meeting fear in your children?” We can use the same strategies for ourselves.
- Honey, there is nothing to fear, we are in this together, you are not alone.
- Darling, there is nothing to fear, stop being afraid, there is no need to be afraid.
- Sweetheart, tell me about more your fear, where do you feel it, when did it begin, can we can hug that part of you, what do you need to feel safe?
- It’s Ok to be afraid, everybody is from time to time
- Breathe to the count of 4, 6 and then 8
All of these strategies work. And you can add to them, “shall we infinitise the fear?” (a description of infinitising follows below). Of course, the third avenue takes more time and energy, but I suspect unravelling and meeting the fear with patience and love will have a lasting impact.
Concerning the passing comment about uncertainty, there has always been uncertainty, it is part of our journey on earth. It’s also not new. Coming to terms with uncertainty is part of the human adventure. The difference now is that uncertainty is right in your face, especially as it is a media sensation.
How we perceive uncertainty matters. Most people experience it as a negative thing. They don’t see that uncertainty allows for infinite possibility, and that certainty can limit us to finite dead-ends. Perhaps, it is up to us to choose to embrace the uncertainty and the infinite opportunities that this presents.
The Infinity Exercise and the Detachment Process
My secret for living with uncertainty with calm is the daily application of the infinity exercise.
The ‘Infinity Exercise’ is part of the LiberatingTouch® Detachment Process and is a visualisation technique, where you visualise or imagine that you are in one loop of a large ‘Infinity symbol’ and the object, symbol or person that you need to detach from is in the opposite loop of the ‘Infinity symbol’. You then visualise a ‘white serpent of light’ moving along the path of the ‘Infinity symbol’ (clockwise or counter-clockwise), looping around you and then looping around the ‘other’, as illustrated in the diagram below.
As you do this your thoughts will create a vortex of energy spinning around you in one direction and spinning around the loop in front of you in the opposite direction. Physics tells us that objects spinning in opposite directions cannot come together but will pull apart. A vortex will also pull everything to its centre, just like water in a sink which spirals as it drains out. When we do this exercise, we are communicating to the subconscious, in symbolic language, to deprogram our attachment to the object, person or symbol in the loop opposite us. Therefore, the subconscious will free the energy locked in the conditioned process and allow us to reclaim our power. In effect, it is breaking the pattern of control (fear). The mind is extremely powerful and thoughts can manifest energetically (as you think so it becomes).
This exercise can be used whenever you feel that you are reacting to someone or something, even during a phone call, or when conversing with someone. All you have to do is put yourself in one loop of the Infinity symbol, and the person or object in the other loop and visualise the ‘white serpent of light’ going along the path of the ‘Infinity symbol’, till your reaction stops, or till you experience serenity.
This one visualisation can help you at any time to create space so that you can respond to any situation/person with clarity and strength. We all know how easy it is to get enmeshed in irate conversations, to be triggered by a remark, or to feel pressured. If in that moment, you remember to visualise, think, or even trace the Infinity symbol with your fingers, and imagine that you are in one loop, and the distressing/annoying/confusing issue/person is in the other loop; you can instantly create the breathing space you require to disengage from the story and take inspired action. The use of the Infinity Exercise is colloquially referred to as infinitising.
You can infinitise to detach from someone or something which makes you react negatively, or from that which you are trying to control, or from someone or something you are allowing to control you. This exercise draws all your scattered energy back to you, and similarly all the energy of the person, or challenge, back to itself in the other loop. This weakens the energetic links and allows you to meet any situation, person, addiction, or substance with understanding and compassion.
You can learn more about this in Eddie and Ranjana’s book, ‘DETACHMENT – The Secret to Infinite Peace’ available on Amazon.
Figuring it out
People look to science for certainty and then discover that much of scientific theory nowadays is based on agenda or conjecture. It’s ok, we gotta start somewhere. Staying curious, keeping an open mind helps. Listening to the inner (intuitive heart) wisdom, opening to flow brings surprising answers to our conscious awareness.
When figuring it out, a curious mind can open many pathways, listening to the heart wisdom illuminates the path.
Conjecture, guessing, hypothesizing, exploring, putting the pieces together, following the clues, mixing and matching, testing, quantifying, qualifying, storing, deciding, imposing, projecting and more, these are the wonders of the mind
Understanding, intuiting, accepting, engaging, allowing, illuminating, gazing, wondering, opening, loving, forgiving, resolving, enlightening, seeking, finding, honing, unifying, these are the miracles of the heart.
The Infinity Exercise and the Detachment process helps us to harness the faculties of the mind while tuning into the heart.
One of the hurdles facing humanity is the inability to let go of doer-ship, the inability to trust the forces of nature that are at play. Thinking you are in charge and that you need to be on top of the situation, that you have to know with certainty what’s next, has its place, but most times it’s limiting and creates strife.
This need for certainty and to be in charge is one of the reasons that people choose control and violence instead of nonviolence and flow. The latter leads to harmony, effortlessness and alignment with nature.
Here are a few symptoms of doer-ship:
1. You start a project feeling enthusiastic but you end up feeling frustrated
2. You feel exhausted at the end of the day
3. You constantly slide into “it’s not good enough”
4. You compare your efforts with others
5. You compete with those around you
6. You feel judged and you judge those around you
7. The hurdles that come your way seem insurmountable
8. It is hard to let go
9. You resist life, assistance, support and new ways of looking at things
When you let go of the need to be in control, i.e. being the one doing it all, you create balance, you become a force that is not forcing itself. I know it sounds paradoxical. But that is, what being an instrument of love and truth is. It is about surrender. Surrender to, and trust in, the innate benevolent wisdom within us. This has the power to bring harmony and balance in this troubled world corrupted by greed and fear.
By being an instrument, we are easily inspired, we can flow with the innate intuitive wisdom. There is no exhaustion, there are no limitations, there is flow and openness. It becomes easier to rest, to play, to work, to eat, to read, to let go, to stop getting so caught up in the minutiae of “should”. Life is good, if we can sidestep the mind and its demands every now and then.
When I find myself caught up in the same old, same old, cycle of wanting to be in charge, I infinitise.
A little side note on the coronavirus, if we can for a moment stop trying to control it, destroy it, see it as the enemy, we might be able to see it for what it is. Perhaps, it is an effect of our blindness to the plight of the planet? What if nature is using the virus as a harmonising force, asking us to take stock. STOP, and wake up to all that we have, all that we can. One of the best things about the lock-down was witnessing the planet breathe a little easier. It is something to ponder, what if we stayed at home, rested and hibernated more often? What if we stopped running around in a mad chase to get it all done, acquire, spend, consume, achieve? What if we stopped chasing certainty and embraced uncertainty? What if we opened to the wonders of nature and its infinite beauty? What if…
This is all for now, lovingly, Ranjana